When we don’t understand and accept our own stories, we will find that we constantly judge both ourselves and others. We will keep reading and listening to self-help advice or maybe even sermons, looking for tips and tricks to help us stop spending money, tell people no, take risks, hold our tongues, stop bad habits, express ourselves honestly, or tolerate other people’s bad moods. The advice helps, but it lacks valuable context. The tips and tricks are missing the emotional depth and detail that motivate us to continue with real, lasting acceptance and change.

"Let’s be open to letting go of cultural myths. We know that the benefits of teenage smartphones do not outweigh the risks and harms. There are thousands of reasons for buying a phone for your child, but there is only one reason to skip it: your child’s health and well-being. And that reason matters more than all the others."

"They are really fighting shadows—things they have already lived through but are still trying to avoid or control in their current world. Their anxiety is a repetition, a representation of that old wound—now placed onto a new topic or person."

Rather than attempting to directly change the FTL behavior through threats or lecturing, parents focused on modifying their own behavior by gradually decreasing the accommodations and trusting in their child’s capacity to grow.

“Distraction only works temporarily and, unfortunately, contributes to higher anxiety in the long run.”

Maybe the initial anxiety started during a period of great stress, but what keeps it going is how you react to those symptoms now.